Fable III (360)

I took my sweet time with this review for one simple reason: this game was disappointing. Not so much in terms of it being a bad game, but rather in the sense that it didn't feel like a natural progression of the Fable lineage and it also felt like a very disjointed game.

In playing the game, I was initially intrigued by the idea of my character being royalty, the Princess of Albion (I always play as a girl, don't ask why). Within 15 minutes of the game starting, my character was ripped from the teat of vanity and made into a poor, miscreant warrior trying to defend the people. It was exactly the same as the Fable and Fable II in format, but not content.

The best part of Fable II for me was the grandeur of the world and the ability to explore its every nook and cranny. There were several sidequests well worth doing and tons of opportunities to turn a few tricks to make some money, earn legendary weapons and purchase epic properties. Fable III on the other hand seems dedicated to the story. A story which is rather simple.

Fable and Fable II had powerful story lines that allowed you to grow with other characters and harbor a hatred for the big-bad. Fable III rushes you through it. I managed to beat it the first time in two days of playing and I tried to take my time and take in Albion. New worlds were introduced, like Aurora, but I took no interest in them in my first play through. On the second playthrough, I spent more time exploring and still felt as disconnected as I did the first time.

So, why is that? In Fable II the towns and locations felt more alive and the conversation wheel was much more fluid than the newly introduced "binary" system. Being able to choose each and every action in a given conversation made me feel closer to the game's world, but Fable III made me feel more like I was playing a game. The attempt at a menu-less system also made it seem more fluid at first, but I quickly ran into issues with gameplay. It's a great concept to take out menus, since they tend to take you out of combat, but being unable to switch spells on the fly in combat took away some of the versatility and fun in combat. Instead of using any face buttons to switch spells, the player must pause the game, which takes you to The Sanctuary. The Sanctuary is a wonderful place where John Cleese tells you that there's new things to buy on Xbox Live every time you enter, then you get to enter different chambers and visually pick out your weapons and spells without being able to compare them to one and other. I, personally, preferred the menu system of the second game.

Lionhead promised an amazing set of kingly decisions to be made. They said we would feel like absolutely kings of Albion. Unfortunately, they simply gave the players two consistent choices. Those choices being "make or save money and have people hate you" or "spend money and have people like you." All this with a deadline to make 5,000,000 gold on your head. The second playthrough offered no moral issues, as I raised about 10,000,000 before reaching that point of the game through real estate and then made everybody happy. Upon reaching the end of the game, I simply stood in one place firing my rifle and taking health potions to kill the big-baddie. I did this both times.

At the end of the day, my time in Albion seemed superficial. It seemed more like Albion needed a property magnate than a Hero. I have little drive to go back and get achievements or playthrough on the evil path. The game stuns on a visual level and have extremely high production values, but the story and world tend to sap the game of everything that I loved from previous titles.

Sound:9/10
Graphics:10/10
Story:6/10
Overall:7/10
Pros: Big world, fun to play, easy achievements
Cons: Short, feels confined, doesn't live up to prior titles
Play if you like: Fable & Fable II

Upcoming, easily

I've got two reviews coming up soon, so, stay tuned. Fable III was a quick game and Goldeneye is shortly to be completed by me. Force Unleashed II and Deadly Premonition still require me to finish them.

This fall is too laden with games for me to keep up with anything, especially in my financial state. But, keep close, and I'll let you know about a few games!

An interim message.

So, I've got Lego Indiana Jones II and Deadly Premonition. Both of which have a good amount of time devoted to them, but neither are finished (and from what I understand about DP, it's far from finished). But, I'll give you a quick rundown for now.

Deadly Premonition is one of the most visceral and cerebral games I've played in years. It sucks, hardcore, but enduring the suck isn't that hard, given the game's brilliant writing, story and awkward details.

Lego Indy II? Waste of time. I don't suggest it.

On the 26th, I'll be purchasing Fable III and Force Unleashed II, so, expect those soon, as well.

Upcoming!

Well, I got Deadly Premonition. Forgive the language, but... this game is fucked up. Unfortunately, I'm a little buried in F. Scott Fitzgerald and Spanish legends right now to put enough time into it. Two chapters in, it's MESSED UP! But, it's also the WORST GAME I've ever played. But the story and environment are AWESOME! Ow... my brain broke.

When the time comes, I'll have reviews for Fable III and Force Unleashed II for you, too. But, first. Let's read a little The Damned and the Beautiful.

Syberia (NDS)

The $5 price was not enough to make up for this horrible port. They cut out a ton from the game, dumbed down the puzzles, made the soundtrack annoying and really fucked up porting the game over. After about 45 minutes of playing the DS version, I switched back to the PC version and placated my urge to play a Benoit Sokal game.

In order to make it up to you guys for even mentioning this game, here's an awesome picture of a linux fan I found:

Dead Rising 2: Case 0 (XBL)

Dead Rising (360) was the entire reason I bought an Xbox 360. I remember that day. I bought my 360 the day before the game came out so that I wouldn't have to waste any of my time working on setting up the 360. So, when they announced the sequel I freaked the hell out. When I heard they were releasing a prologue of the game: I freaked out again.

So, I bought it and played it. It costs about $5 and is an Xbox Live exclusive. The game follows the classic Dead Rising format, but improves in a couple of places. The game's cutscenes are par and the story in this prologue is fairly mundane, but more character centric than the original game. You find yourself in a small town infected with zombies with the military bearing down on you while you need to save your little girl and escape.

So, it's better than "you're in a mall, do what they say." The gameplay is almost identical, but Capcom decided to grace us with combo weapons. These weapons are built by you and included dual chainsaws on a stick, a bucket full of nails and a spiked baseball bat. The weapons seemed rather uninspired. The amount of guns in Case 0 made other weapons seem rather unnecessary, especially considering how precious guns were in the original game. It was fun mowing down hordes of the undead with assault rifles.

Survivors this time around are much more durable than in the original, which makes saving them much less of a task. As well, the text is much easier to read in the game. It was an enjoyable game, but was completely beatable within a couple of hours. Certain parts were actually frustrating, especially the idea of an economy in game. It literally consists of "break machine, buy things." Not too cool. The awkward platforming parts also stopped game play for some time while I tried to work out a way across the roofs. The boss fight in game was extremely one sides and cheaply played by Capcom. He's a big fat redneck who plays dirty and cheap. Very

It was worth the cost of admission, but was extremely short and not what I was expecting at all. There is no extended play mode, no free roam, nothing like that. You only get to fool around by doing a "new game +" type deal. Any experience you earn in one play through carries over to the next.

I highly suggest this to any fans of Dead Rising, zombies or just looking for a good value on XBL. Go for it!

Sound:8/10
Graphics:8/10
Story:5/10
Overall:9/10
Pros: ZOMBIES
Cons: Short, very little content
Play if you like: Zombies, Dead Rising, Resident Evil, Capcom

Coming Up!

I'll be doing a review of Mafia II and Dead Rising 2: Case 0 soon, as well as a hardware review of a monitor.

Mafia II (360, PC)

Mafia II is a wonderfully rendered and written game with top notch voice acting. For all the stellar effort that the programmers, developers and distributors put into the game, it still falls horribly short of the bar set by almost all other GTA Clones on the market and released in the last ten years.

The game takes some obvious cues and steps straight out of GTA IV as well as gameplay cues from several other games, what it lacks compared to others, is any sense or semblance of freedom. Mafia II at first seems like an open world game, but quickly exposes itself to be a completely linear experience. You cannot tailor the gameplay or story to your own preference. What makes it even worse is that any work you do towards advancing your character's home, bank and weapons are taken away multiple times in the course of the game. It does little to promote the idea of freedom.

Empire Bay, the city in which the game is set, is an absolutely stunning and beautifully rendered city. The problem with this is that the city feels as though it exists solely for the protagonist and that nothing happens without the player's consent. The stores are all identical, the police are inconsistent about chasing after you and the citizens of the town double up worse than GTA III. In the same block, you're liable to see the same woman or man four or five times.

The game also seems extremely rickety when it comes to testing. I encountered several glitches in the game that didn't break the game, but rather amused. I witnessed more than a couple of cars spawn upside down, at least one AI character repeatedly climbing stairs and jumping off the ledge over and over again and a magazine capacity of 1022 for the .38 Revolver. None of them made the game unplayable, but it did detract from the over all production values of the game.

The selection of cars and weapons is pretty pitiful compared to several other games, but still satisfactory. Often, a street would be littered with 30 of the same car. The weapons are neat, but why do I need a Thompson 1928, M1A1, M3A1, an MP40 and a Riesling for? They all do the same thing, why not just let us carry more ammo? The variation of the pistols made sense, but the variation of rifles and SMGs was rather perplexing. I did enjoy the variation, being a gun nut, but I saw no purpose. The cars all drove rather well, and given that the game starts in the winter of 1945 with 80hp RWD cars with no traction control the "speed limiter" came in quite handy. I was able to keep the cars under control in conditions that were less than ideal.

That isn't to say I didn't enjoy the game, I absolutely loved it when I could ignore all the issues with the game. But I didn't enjoy the consistency of the missions. A "chapter" of the game consists of Vito waking up, answering a phone, doing a mission, driving home. It was annoying that in order to complete the mission you had to make an insanely long drive in slow driving cars back to your apartment to go to sleep. The story is a classic "gangster" story from any GTA Clone ever made, it even has a facsimile of Roman from GTA IV. The character of Joe Barbaro is almost identical to Roman in every way, lacking only the accent.

I would recommend this game once the price goes down, but a $60 ten hour experience that you expect to be open world seems a bit much, especially considering the lack of a soundtrack, each of the three radio stations plays the same few songs OVER AND OVER AND OVER AND OVER again, it gets annoying. The collectibles are pretty neat, playboy centerfold pictures and wanted posters, but that's it. Not to mention the game takes place in 1945 and 1951, but features music from the late 50's and playboy, which wouldn't exist for several years. If you pick this up, look out for the nod to the first Mafia game. For the PC version, modders have already added a "Free Roam" feature similar to the first Mafia game, so if you're interested in that aspect, the PC version will be your console of choice for the game.

Definitely worth $20-40 bucks, but not the full $60. Although, a car full of drunk Italians singing along to Dean Martin is well worth it

Sound:6/10
Graphics:9/10
Story:8/10
Overall:6/10
Pros:Looks beautiful, interesting story, awkward semblance of morality in the game.
Cons:Restrictive world, no free roam, guns sound crappy, only 5 or 6 different cars per era.
Play if you like: Story missions in GTA and like games, being teased by the idea of free-roam, good old fashioned racism.

Big News!

So, I've set up a youtube channel dedicated to "Let's Play" videos of odd games. The first series is Eco Quest 1: The Search for Cetus and Westwood's Blade Runner will follow suit.

http://www.youtube.com/user/LetsPlayThomme

Also, I've recently submitted reviews to the website Abandonia and their subsequent E-zine Abandoned times. The submitted reviews are for Lucasart's X-wing, Gremlin Interactive's Realms of the Haunting and Iguana's Turok: Dinosaur Hunter. Look for me in Issue 2!

http://www.abandonia.com/en/abandonia-times

As well, upcoming game reviews on this site will most likely include From Russia With Love on the PS2 and hopefully Deadly Premonition (how long have I been talking about this game?). I'm as well considering doing a write up of 007:Quantum of Solace on the 360, but I feel that it's little more than James Bond mixed with Call of Duty 4. (I'm not saying it's a bad game, it's honestly the best bond since Goldeneye)

So, that's what's up right now. Classes have started up for me and I'm knee deep in Hemingway and waist deep in Spanish, but I'm planning on continuing along with this blog!

Much Love!

coming up!

I'm going to start including a ranking of "sound," "graphics" and "story" in my upcoming reviews. On prior posts that I feel I need to add things to, I'll add information regarding these issues. Upcoming reviews will include this at the bottom:
Sound:x/10
Graphics:x/10
Story:x/10
Overall:x/10
Pros:x
Cons:x
Play if you like:x

Silent Hill 4: The Room (Xbox)

This is a "Legacy Review" of a game I just recently decided to play.

Silent Hill has long stood as one of my favorite series of games, but I've always written off the fourth installment, The Room, as an afterthought of the series. That being said: I've left playing it off for far too long.

Upon playing the game I was introduced to a first person perspective that played opposite of what I'm used to (when I play FPS, I play with reverse up and down axis, I'm'a freak, ok!?) and with poorly written controls. But I quickly found myself placed into something far more "Silent Hill" than the initial few minutes of the game.

It should be noted that this game was initially created as a new IP for the company, and not a continuation of the Silent Hill story. This is apparent in the extremely different gameplay and flow of the game. Upon playing the game I found the ebb and flow of this "non Silent Hill Silent Hill" was much better than any Silent Hill I'd played before (I've played ALL of them, including the GBA Play Novel) and found that this game's flow was more organic. It uses the character's (Henry Towmshend) apartment as a staging ground. It gives you a chest in which to keep excess inventory items, as well as a place to restore health (in the earlier parts of the game, everytime you return here, your health returns to full), as well as a way to keep an eye on your neighbors, watch the your world change and even futz around. When a hole opens up in his bathroom Henry ventures into it and it's magically Silent Hill-esque!

Once you venture into the "other world" the view changes from the broken first person view into a perfect "Survival Horror" style third person view and the accompanying controls. At this point: the game becomes natural. As with any SH game, you're in a subway, working your way through and finding out why the character was trapped in his own apartment. And this is where you start to find out why a character living in an apartment outside of Silent Hill has any connection to the world of Harry Mason (I know, I initially wrote Henry, but H-names confuse me!) and James Sunderland.

The first half of the game plays fantastically beautifully (if that's not the most broken description ever, let me know what is!) and the introduction of the apartment as a healing option allows you to play the game fairly casually. Examining the life and times of a serial killer connected to both the main character of the game and the Silent Hill universe. It's a fairly easy to play game compared to prior titles, as well as later titles, in the series. Compared to the health and weapon systems in Origins, 1, 2, 3, Homecoming and Shattered Memories, this game was easy and flowed, story wise, much better than all of them. It was almost magically well made!

Then the second half rolled around. And wow, did things go downhill. Upon entering "Hospital World" you find that you're magically attached to a female neighbor that you know nothing about and your character has no connection to at all (other than spying on her through a hole in your wall throughout the game). To top that off, your apartment becomes haunted and stops healing you when you visit it. Without the use of special objects, your apartment will essentially kill you when you visit it to save. You also visit all of the same worlds you've already visited.

It's not as bad as it sounds, since you can "cleanse your apartment." The change in game style not only includes a new "dangerous" save zone and potentially deadly "home world," but an escort mission for the rest of the game. It took me a lot of "trial and error" to figure out I could leave the "escorted" in certain areas of most worlds in order to avoid damaging her. The game quickly takes a different turn, and honestly, I stopped playing for a while once it changed.

This change is where it becomes suspiciously like a Silent Hill game. I hated the switch from a perfectly flowing and made game to one that hated you like all other games of the series, but upon taking the time to really delve into the game, I found it made sense and was completely playable. The change was abrupt and upsetting, but it was worth it.

Honestly, it fits well into the Silent Hill mythos, but isn't necessary, but it's also one of the more poorly made Silent Hill games made. It doesn't stand a chance compared to any of the other games, including Origins. It also doesn't add anything to the story, but if you haven't played it and you're a suvival horror or Silent Hill fan, it's well worth the 5 to 10 hours it takes to play.

Overall: 7/10
As a Silent Hill fan: 5/10
Pros: Good gameplay, awkward hauntings that will haunt you, adds to the story of Silent Hill, better camera than most earlier Survival Horror games
Cons: Gets too hard too fast, flow of the game gets messed up, seems superficial
Play if you like: Silent Hill games, fucked up FPS controls, a game that changes flow completely at the half way point.

News on the blog!

You may have noticed that I'm posting from a different name. Well, I attached my G-mail account to this blog. So, don't worry, I'm still the same horror lover. I might try some "old" reviews on here, digging up some back catalog games and throwing up a review. I'm still trying to get my hands on Deadly Premonition (360), but I'm unwilling to pay full price (even though it's only $20) for a "broken" game and it seems it's not a very "available" game when it comes to the used market.

For the time being, enjoy the FFIV review, it's keeping me up tonight.

Fatal Frame IV: The Mask of the Lunar Eclipse [Zero: Tsukihami no Kamen] (Wii)

I'm a horror game fan, through and through. And I gotta say: it takes a lot to frighten me. Sure, Exorcist gave me a run for my money, true I got freaked out by the dogs jumping through the windows in Resident Evil, it's true that Silent Hill 2 made me uncomfortable when I beat it. But nothing, and I mean absolutely no movie or game, has ever given me the shakes quite like Fatal Frame does.

I can't really say that I've noticed a ton of differences between Fatal Frame games, I've played 1 & 2 on Xbox and 3 on PS2, and now 4 on Wii. It looks no different than the Xbox versions of yore, but it definitely looks better (although not a whole lot better) than the PS2 version of 3 that we got. The version that I have is a "patched" version that was modded to have English subtitles in it, the audio and some messages in the game are still in the original Japanese, but overall, the patch was wonderful. I was led to understand that this "mod" was done in conjunction with the Project Zero team, so I felt apt in my use of this mod. The story of this game was fairly formulaic for a Fatal Frame game, but a better one for the genre of Survival Horror on the whole. I honestly don't recall the names of ANYBODY in this game, due mostly to the Japanese names, but the story is about a group of girls abducted by a serial killer. Nothing surprising ever happened in the game, but the atmosphere and ghosts freaked me the hell out while I was playing.

Another odd occurrence that they brought back (that I didn't really enjoy the first time Tecmo implemented it) is the idea of multiple playable characters. But they did implement a control scheme/camera set-up more closely related to Resident Evil 4 & 5 than previous entries on the genre. I thought that was a nice way to tighten up the overall feel of the game, while the multiple characters was a move in the wrong direction. My problem with the multiple character approach (same goes for most other games) is that I feel a terrible disconnect from the game when I'm suddenly Madoka, when just a few minutes ago I as Ruka, or whatever the fuck their names are. I'm also always put off by characters in many Japanese games. I was uncomfortable with how attractive they made near prepubescent girls look in the previous titles, but this one was a bit more acceptable. The characters showed age a bit better. Except for the man! This guy looks like he's 20, but he's supposed to be a seasoned detective. I was unaware that you could be a seasoned detective before your liver goes out! But, yeah, wow. That Japanese are weird.

The new "Wii" controls are fairly intuitive. It's a hard system to describe, but it seems that they solved the drifting camera issues that I suffer from in other games. The motion/IR controller sticked to the up/down axis when not using the Camera Obscura and it turns into a straight up FPS style control when you are in control of the Camera Obscura. But the controls were extremely well worked out and very well set-up.

This game scared the hell out of me. The Fatal Frame games have always scared the hell out of me. And this one kind of ruined my night. I sat down with a bottle of wine (Bolla 2009 Pinot Grigio) and played the last few hours of the game tonight. I had to take a couple of breaks through the night to calm down, and unfortunately I was out of cigarettes and couldn't smoke, and was too scared to go to the corner store to get some. I mean these are scary, scary games. Anyone looking for a good, scary gaming experience should look into this series.

There's really not a whole lot more to say about this game. It's on par with previous titles in the series, it's probably the best true "Survival Horror" game released for the current generation of consoles. I wouldn't say it's a better game than Resident Evil 4 or 5, but it's definitely better than Obscure 2: The Aftermath, Silent Hill: The Homecoming, Alone in the Dark and most likely Deadly Premonition. Definitely worth a play for any horror enthusiast.

Note: This game was released solely in Japan. Unfortunately Nintendo felt that we should not be allowed to play this game on their system over here. I'm'a supporter of Homebrew software, as well as unlocked systems (regarding regions, as well as disc type), but I understand why the companies do what they do. In order to get this game to work on my system, it took me about four hours of tinkering and softmodding. I'm a little afraid that Goldeneye won't work on my system when it's released due to this modding, so, I should warn you to be aware of this. Also, you have to use all sorts of weird software mods and patches to get the game into English, and then you'll still have to burn it onto a disc, even if you own the original Japanese version. So, it's a headache to get to play, but it's well worth it!

Overall: 7/10
Pros: A new Fatal Frame game, great controls, scary as fucking hell, awesome audio
Cons: A pain in the ass to get it to play on US systems, graphics that don't impress compared to current standards, only released in Japan, scary as fucking hell
Play if you like: sleeping with the lights on, survival horror games, Japanese horror movies, tinkering with your system's "nand" or whatever the hell it's called

Edit: it turns out that I got my patch for the game from the wrong source: http://www.fatalframe4.net/ gives you an instant patch with no modding or burning. That wouldn've have saved me a lot of trouble, and made me alot happier to spend the $70 on the game. As if stands, the way I did it frustrated the hell out of me and I redact some of my complaints regarding the game.

Deadly Premonition (360), Fatal Frame IV (Wii)

I've been trying to get my hands on this game on the cheap. As soon as I do, I'll play it and get ya'll a review of it. The game actually really intrigues me. I know it's terrible, but so are 90% of Survival Horror games that aren't Silent Hill or Resident Evil.

Also, I've spent an absurd amount of time trying to soft mod my wii to play Fatal Frame 4. Anyone with advice on this, I'd love to hear! I've been a fan of Fatal Frame since day one, and now I can't play the new one!

Red Dead Redemption (360)

Hello my lovelies! Just thought I'd let you know. I've gotten and played Red Dead Redemption. The reason I've not done a review on it is simply because... I don't think my words can do the game justice. It's just amazing. Thought I'd let you know. Here's the breakdown:

Overall: 9/10
Pros: Beautiful graphics, story throws twists, plays very well, great voice acting, great writing, lots of little things to help occupy you between story missions.
Cons: Some of the guns are silly (LeMats don't load like a Schofield!), multiplayer is full of the SHITTIEST people on Xbox Live!, some of the characters are disappointingly flat, James Martson's kid is a piece of shit.
Play if you Like: GTA games, Westerns.

What We Should all Know About Goldeneye (2010, Wii)

Putting a month between posts is a fun and accurate way to make sure that my posts are full of nutty goodness, nugget and mouth watering caramel. Wait, that's not what you want out of a blog... wait... no, that's like a candy bar. This post is starting to sound like a trademark infringing good time full of trans fats, complex carbohydrates and calories. Wait a tick: once again I went to food. Isn't this a videogame blog? Yeah. Ok.... back to the topic at hand.

There's a new game coming out. Slated for a Q4 release on Nintendo's powerhouse home console, as well as their powerhouse handheld. It's a complicated 13 year stretch of gaming drama that drove some people insane. Some homebrew developers attempted to make ports using the Half-life engines. Some other folks hacked the hell out of the original game and even inserted online play via a Gameshark hooked up to a PC. And the original developers essentially made a sequel to the game, despite the fact that they lost the IP. Another developer released a "sequel" that featured not only bad gameplay, but bad puns, bad story-telling and bad everything else. But us gamers. We've just been frothing at the mouth like rabid assholes demanding (with a passion that exceeds that of any rational man, woman, child, ape or pit-bull is capable of) that we get a new version or a sequel or something. We would not be placated by anything anyone gave us.

Well, guess what? We're getting it. Activision is re-imagining Goldeneye (which actually means this is the third developer to take the reigns of this magical IP). What a lot of posters on the internet seem blatantly unaware of is the 13 year history of the James Bond franchise and it's dirty relationship with the gaming public.

I'll start at the source, for those of you too young to understand (I just realized this game is older than most of the shit talkers on Xbox Live!). Every once in a while there comes a game that will help redefine a genre. In the case of First Person Shooters (FPSs) these are easily remembered and seminal games, be it John Romero's Doom and Doom II (if I have to tell you what consoles, you don't deserve to be on this blog), Rare's Goldeneye (1997, N64), Valve's Half-life (1998, PC) and Infinity Ward's Call of Duty 4 (2007, PC) are all titles that come to mind almost instantly. But Goldeneye really cinched the idea of a "casual" FPS and offered gameplay that not only required you to have to think about how you played the game, but also varied each playthrough of the level. It offered cheats that would make the game interesting for replays and also challenged you to beat yourself. And the multiplayer.

The game offered beautifully modelled guns that looked and functioned better than anything you'd seen in any PC games before it. It gave you varied gameplay in multiplayer and singleplayer. It gave millions of gamers and casual players alike hours of fun in multiplayer and a bonding experience for friends. Everybody had their favorite gameplay options. Some preferred the dastardly "Proximity mines in Complex with one hit kills" while others still preferred the fast-paced and quick "You Only Live Twice with the Goldengun in Temple" and then there's the goofy "Slappers Only in Stacks" fun.

Wow, this is bringing back memories. Plus the game had almost 100 characters to choose from in multiplayer. Wow. It seems that Activision is only giving us a handful of characters. Weeping.

In those days (the days that some gamers recall as "the glory days") Rare was a well regarded developer. They brought us many N64 games that epitomized the system, such as Donkey Kong, Goldeneye, Banjo-Kazooie and Perfect Dark. These guys were defining what gaming would be. Fantastic. But turmoil and gaming politics changed then. EA was posturing to become a huge monster of a company and bought up the James Bond franchise, shortly after the end of the N64, Microsoft bought Rare and any hope of a Goldeneye sequel went down the drain. EA attempted to milk the James Bond franchise to death, with less than stellar releases like The World is Not Enough (N64, 2000) and Tomorrow Never Dies (PSx, 1999). These games both suffered from poor graphics and clunky gameplay. EA tried harder with later releases, making new "movies" out of their games and even bringing Sean Connery in for his final performance as Senor Bond. They even tried to bring back the "Goldeneye" franchise with Goldeneye: Rogue Agent (I'm not gonna bother to cite this piece of trash) and simply produced one of the worst FPSs I've ever played.

And so, the torch got passed. From EA to Activision. Activision's a distributer that tends to put out some great games and they respect their customers, rather than shitting on them like EA (hey, EA, fuck you! I can't redownload a $50 game I bought from you last summer!). But Activision gave us what we wanted: Quantum of Solace (2008, multiplatform) which did, essentially, to Casino Royale and Quantum of Solace that Rare did with Goldeneye in 1997. It rewrote the movie into a cinematic game, but this time it was more fast paced. They took the fast action of Daniel Craig and turned it into a fantastic action game with some of the best voice acting I've experienced. The whole crew was there! It also rolled Casino Royale and Quantum of Solace together into one big experience and offered us a fun break from the action in the form of a vomit inducing poisoned sequence. I claim it's the best Bond game since Goldeneye.

So, now that I've got Doom and Perfect Dark on my Xbox 360 and older Zelda games downloaded to my Wii, why can't I get Goldeneye? I'm not 100% sure and haven't read this, but this is my understanding. Ready?

Nintendo owns the license and distro for the original Goldeneye.
Rare owns the Goldeneye property.
Microsoft owns Rare.
Microsoft does not produce, distribute or develop for the Wii.
Nintendo does not produce, distribute or develop for the 360.
Activision owns the James Bond franchise.

Ergo: nobody owns enough of the properties to produce a DLC version of Goldeneye 007 for either the Wii or the 360. But, I think that my head just exploded.

The new Goldeneye, being developed by Activision and released on the Wii and built (presumably) on the COD 4 engine, will be an entirely different beast than Goldeneye of yor. It features Daniel Craig (yes, the actual James Bond) lending his voice acting, likeness and attitude to the endeavor. This is another point that seems to be upsetting a lot of gamers. This awkward need to have everything identical. Activision can't produce an identical game for several reasons. Most of which are outlined in my above breakdown of who owns what. But with a change in Bond, we also have to expect a change in the style of the game (afterall, we can't have wet-behind-the-ears Daniel Craig 007 acting like veteran Peirce Brosnan 007) and so the gameplay changes slightly.

And people are bemoaning the graphics. Woah is you if you think this game looks like crap. You have been spoiled. This game is fantastic looking for the limitations of the hardware.

That's pretty much all I have to say on this subject right now. Hope you enjoyed my college level lecture on James Bond gaming.

EDIT: Goldeneye (Wii, 2010) is actually being developed by Eurocom, same as Quantum of Solace (360, PS3, PC). They are distributed by Activision.

extend into my personal life?

Should this blog extend into my personal life?

If I did choose to do that, you'd have to hear about Modernist Literature, Drinking, Relationship fun, Shooting, Music, Movies, Cars and Videogames. I'm'a bit of a well rounded man, so I know a lot of shit, but I think that I should keep this videogame oriented. If I get any comments to the contrary, I might change my mind.

I feel like nobodies reading this.

So, I'll let you know. Still waiting on Red Dead Redemption. That review will be hardcore. You'll see!

Old School Webcomics, homemade by me.

These were all made at the beginning of the 7th Generation, so the references are dated. Also, I'm not an artist, so, ignore the bad imagery.

Grand Theft Auto IV: The Ballad of Gay Tony (XBL)

Rockstar's been great to us gamers for years. These guys brought us Lemmings, Grand Theft Auto, the RAGE game engine and... ok, so that's about it. But the fact of the matter is that they created a massive in game universe where everything tied in and worked well with on and other, much better than most other developers. Games like Manhunt and Bully take place in the same universe as Grand Theft Auto and make awkward appearances throughout the GTA games through easter eggs and news reports in game.

So, it's no surprise that The Ballad of Gay Tony (TBoGT) is a very beautifully written and developed episode of the GTA experience. The game begins much like any other GTA game, with a video montage introducing us to our new protagonist and a vague descriptor of the main architecture of the game. Luis, the new lead character, is someone you'll recognize instantly and quickly fall in love with. It's true that he doesn't have the tragic issue that Niko Bellic exposed us to or the internal strife of Carl "CJ" Johnson (of San Andreas), but he is a well rounded and written character.

The issue with Luis, though, is that his story is almost comically formulaic. His dad walked out on the family, his single mother doesn't have the money to keep her house, he spent time in jail and his friends berate him for getting a job "Downtown" with Gay Tony. Tony is a character that truly emulates the meaning of the GTA games, at least the deeper meaning, I'm not willing to say anything more about Tony. He's a character that is everything you don't expect from the name, but fits the GTA formula perfectly.

This game reintroduces the over the top sexual comedy and situations that were recognized in earlier GTA games and Luis' race helps to bring to light humorous racial tensions, especially between he and the Arab Yusuf Amir. At first this language was gritting and offensive, but quickly became hilarious. The game does well to invoke the meaning and humor of San Andreas without rehashing it verbatim. There are several times during TBoGT that I found myself saying "this is like San Andreas!" and my girlfriend even asked if I was playing San Andreas when she saw Luis on screen.

There's really no reason to discuss the gameplay, but I do have to admit that the new weapons and cars were kind of cool, nothing fantastic, though. The new activities were very reminiscent of San Andreas, as well. Rockstar reintroduced the parachute and base jumping, gave us air hockey, drug wars, dancing, drinking games and golfing. The activities weren't as varied or awesome as San Andreas and I wished that they kept all of the activities from the base game and Lost and the Damned and rolled them all into one of the episodes. They also didn't keep the weapons or new vehicles from Lost and the Damned, either. It made the game slightly smaller than I was anticipating.

I thoroughly and whole heartedly enjoyed the game, but I was very let down by the amount of content. It took me about one day of playing to work through the main game and another few hours to complete most of the activities. I don't think it's truly worth the $20 pricetag, it definitely wasn't nearly as large as Liberty City Stories, but still cost the same $20.

I'd recommend this for anyone looking for more of a GTA fix and who have played through the entirety of the series already. If you haven't played through Vice City or San Andreas and don't mind the graphics difference you'd be better off buying a cheap used versions of them instead of spending $20 on a one day long game, even Saints Row would be a better choice than TBoGT, to be honest

Pros: Great graphics, great characters, great gameplay, great fun, calls back to San Andreas a few times.
Cons: Too fucking short, not a ton of things to do in town compared to other GTA games, too expensive.
Overall 7/10
Buy if you like: GTA games and like clones
Don't buy it yet if you haven't played: The entire GTA library since III, just not worth it if you still need to play any other GTA games.

Resident Evil 5: Desperate Escape (XBL)

This was an interesting addition to the game, but in all honesty it was too little too late. People were expecting to see add ons in the caliber of Separate Ways and Assignment Ada on Resident Evil 4. But, the two episodes they gave us for Resident Evil 5 were paltry offerings. Nothing fantastic.

So, this one takes place alongside the last chapter of Resident Evil 5. You play as Jill Valentine and Josh Stone and it explains why there's a magical helicopter at the end of Resident Evil 5. But that's it.

If you're a Resident Evil fan, you'll understand exactly what analogies I'll make in this review.

First things first: I have the same gripes with this one as with Lost in Nightmares. You don't get to use your weapons from the main game, so your upgrades and infinite ammo unlocks are useless. And it's short.

Secondly: the game plays like a short version of the last chapter of Resident Evil 4 plus a weak version of the "Cabin." Not very fun, really. The achievements seem to be almost impossible and the difficulty really adds up when you crank it up. I'm just not pleased with this add-on.

Pros: Completes the Resident Evil 5 story, is Resident Evil, kind of fun
Cons: Short, boring, seems uninspired.
Overall: 9/20
Get if you like: Lost in Nightmares

Rockstar Games, I am your bitch.

So, let's face facts about this: this company has never made a bad game, not once. Well... ok, let's forget about Smugglers Run, The Warriors and The Italian Job. But, let's not forget Earthworm Jim 3D and Bully.

Rockstar has always had the ability to package an extremely violent and seemingly irrelevant game and make it into something relevant. The Grand Theft Auto games have always had a deeper and more sinister meaning to them, such as IV's "Immigrant Story" and San Andreas' comments on racial tensions and inequality.

What's really exciting is their upcoming games, though. I'm going absolutely insane this last week before Red Dead Redemption comes out, I'm amped about Max Payne 3 and I nearly shat myself the first time I saw the trailer for LA Noire. Plus, I recall hearing that they're working on a James Bond-esque game, which puts them in a fantastic position.

One of the most endearing things about Rockstar games is their ability to continue Grand Theft Auto. It's absolutely amazing the amount of work and detail they put into each title in the series, but what's even more amazing is the amount of work and detail they put into spin-offs, extra content and new episodes. I played Vice City (not for the first time, but it was the first time I sat down and played through it) in order to better understand Vice City Stories. And I recall playing Liberty City Stories and knowing my way around Liberty City like the back of my hand. Those were also the last Playstation 2 games I bought. They were almost like a death rattle for the dying system.

Now, I know a different Liberty City. One that's rendered in beautiful hi-def, gripped in terror of terrorists, riddled with cell phones and filled with animated and wonderful people. In preparation of Red Dead Redemption I'm currently replaying GTA IV, Lost and the Damned and finally dug in and bought The Ballad of Gay Tony (expect a review of BoGT this week and one of Red Dead Redemption by the end of next week). And everything about the game that I loved when it first came out still rings true, localization for the game (chronologically) won't grant it the timeless quality that I'd hope a game like this has to offer due to the use of technology and references. Three years later it seems more valid than it was when it first came out but in ten it may be outdated to the point that playing it is a chore. I hope it won't be, cause I want my kids to play it. To help them understand the "Immigrant Story" and that people are forced into doing things by other people sometimes and that they shouldn't be that type of person.

Red Dead Redemption should be no different. I'm'a sucker for Westerns, one of my favorite movie series is Sergio Leone's Man With No Name trilogy. Unfortunately Western video games have always offered a poor examination of what it was. Gun, Call of Juarez, Red Dead Revolver and Dead Man's Hand all offered interesting ideas, but ultimately suffered from poor everything.

The story telling was often done through clunky missions, weapons handled like a game made in the early 90's and balance was often very delicately mismanaged. Rockstar did make a western before, but it was a flat and boring third person shooter that suffered from everything that all other Western games did. Red Dead Redemption, due out on the 18th, will hopefully make up for all the shit that game companies have left on our door steps regarding the genre.

If the trailers and previews are to be believed Red Dead Redemption will be well worth the wait. So, stay tuned to hear from me on that.

Three months no posts?!

What a cliche! Sorry ya'll, been lazy and busy with school!

Who wants to do a webcomic with me?!

Thanks, EA!

great big middle finger to EA. I bought Sims 3: World Adventures online via digital distribution because I didn't feel like going out to buy it. But, the catch here is: it's a fucking 13 hour download. Thanks, EA. As always, right up my ass.

Issues With Digital Distribution

I know what you're thinking "He's going to bemoan the prevelence of incomplete products shipping because of the allowance of downloadable patches!" Fuck no. That's been a problem since day one. Shit for computers always ships broken for someone, somewhere. You just never heard about it before because the internet didn't allow all those dip shits to yell about it to anyone who can hear. You ever try to play Aces Over Europe on a 486? Required a boot disk. Lots of self-patching to get it to run on any system with any less than 16mb of ram. But the box said it'd run with 8mb! A pox on you who forgets about broken games of the past.

No, my problem is this: micro-transactions. Micro-transactions are ruining everything. Well, not everything... but they're adding a level of "Capcom/EA/Activision/Valve shitting on our faces" aspect to the proceedings. I'm an avid Sims player. I've been playing the game since 2000. I bought every expansion pack (from Livin' Large to Makin' Magic or whatever that last abortion was) but I neglected to get a single pack for Sims 2. Now that Sims 3 is out I've been playing the game for about six months. I like it a lot more than the previous installments of the games. But I bought it online. I recently came to find out that EA Downloader isn't the amazing benevolent downloader that Steam is. No. I've got games on Steam that I purchased 6 or 7 years ago tied to an e-mail account that automatically come up when I install Steam onto a new OS or computer. My original borrowed copy of Half-life has followed me across 3 computers and countless OS installs. But EA will only give me one year with Sims 3, then I don't get to download it again if I need. They originally offered a service that would extend your ability to re-download a game for 3 years for the mere cost of $6. I refused. I guess when I need to reinstall the Sims 3 after a year, I'll just pirate it (showing that fucked up DRM leads to pirating).

But that's just one issue with digital downloads. The other issue is that the idea of "micro transactions" is placed in the head of the developer. They know that they can trickle customized items, new levels and new skins to us via download and charge us for them. Lost in Nightmares is a perfect example, as are the downloadable levels for The Force Unleashed. In both games, they offer extended gameplay via downloadable content, but somewhat overcharge for underwhelming results. Force Unleashed, in itself, was a fairly lackluster game. Beautiful graphics and amazing physics, but it lacked variety and any kind of story development. The problem was: the story had multiple endings, meaning that any content released taking place after the game would simply assume which ending took place. And the storyline was defunct in the downloadable content. Some taking place after the light side some taking place after the darkside ending. With Lost in Nightmares, they used a flashback from the game to release a paltry hour long episode. And each level costs about 5 dollars. And doesn't add much, if anything, to the game experience.

Valve and Rockstar have been good about this, offering episodic content at a reasonable price. Their initial episodes: Half-Life Episode 1 and Grand Theft Auto IV: The Lost and the Damned offered games that were a fraction of the length and price of GTA:IV and Half-Life 2, yet had almost as much content per dollar. The outcome was a welcome shift in release format. It was somewhat reminiscent of Liberty City Stories and Vice City Stories, but with less content. (I'm still waiting on San Andreas Stories, by the way!)

But the transactions are getting more expensive and smaller. EA is by far one of the worst offenders of this. With Mass Effect 2 they are bundling in a secret code to access EA's distribution program VIA Xbox Live in new copies to curb people away from buying used copies. Initially this is not a big deal, given the launch releases were somewhat lack luster, but they are releasing seemingly episodic content that people who purchase used games will have to pay for. This gimping of the core experience is solely used as a means to prevent people from buying the used copy and essentially dry up the market.

So... The Sims? The Sims was proof they could do this to us. With each expansion pack they gave us a new game experience. And eventually they started selling us the same experiences over and over again. EA and Maxis perpetrated this atrocity of the industry. Companies like Lucasarts, Microsoft and Activision learned about this formula and promptly began anally raping us.

Don't complain that digital distribution has allowed the shipment of broken games, as it's allowed us to fix those broken games. Rather, digital distribution has simply given the companies a way by which to sell us the same experience over and over again for meager amounts of money that add up. The bonus materials packaged in later ports of certain games (IE: Resident Evil 4 on PS2) have been much more eloquently designed and executed than most extra downloads offered to us by any company short of Rockstar or Valve.

Suck my cock, EA. I want my fucking Sims to be playable this time next year you fuck-tards.

 (If anyone from EA ever reads this, I apologize. I was rather upset that I had to "pirate" my copy of Sims 3 in order to reinstall it after a harddrive failure. The new Origin Client has solved that problem, I appreciate your addressing these sorts of concerns, even if it wasn't directly to/from me.)

Resident Evil 5: Lost in Nightmares/Mercenaries Reunion (XBL)

This was short... too short. So short, in fact, that it left me with a bad taste in my mouth. I'm a huge Resident Evil fan, and trust me... I downloaded and played Lost in Nightmares immediately upon it's going live (yeah, I don't have a life).

So, what's my gripe about this? Well, first of all: all those static cameras that people were talking about are an easter egg you must find (I've heard by opening the front door three times), the puzzles that Capcom's been talking up suck, the enemies are pretty lame and the weapons don't carry over from the main game.

I'll tell you about the puzzles. I can count them on my fingers. The first one, Jill gets trapped under a slowly descending spiked ceiling and Chris must find and flip a switch to turn it off in time. The ceiling is slow and you have ample time to do it. The switch turns out to be much closer to you than you anticipate. The other puzzles are two "find'a'crank" puzzles, one "Boost Jill up to unlock the door," "Play a piano," "Flip a switch" and two "find the amulets/half-circles/medallions/pendants/keys" puzzle. A good approximation of about an hour of playing Resident Evil, but in Lost in Nightmares the puzzles were all solved (with the exception of two) within the same room as the door/prize.

The enemies suck. Hardcore. We (the fans of the series) thought there were to be zombies... nope. Just weird looking guys. And the "Guardian of Evil" that we thought would be the next Lisa Trevor? Nope. Goes down like a little bitch. And the only way Capcom could make him tougher was a dirty "if you shoot him too close to you, you get poisoned" mechanic, the occasional "fight more than one" trick and my favorite: "we took all your weapons away!" fight. I actually suspect him of being a re-skinned Executioner from RE5. And, other than a major spoiler that the main game gave away, that's all the enemies in the game.

Oh, and the weapons! That's great. You get an upgraded M9, find one Magnum and one Sniper Rifle. End of the weapons. I spent a lot of time upgrading the weapons in my inventory for the main game. Why the hell can't I use the infinite ammo Chaingun in this?! Thanks, Capcom.

That's pretty much it for Lost In Nightmares. I spent a lot more time in Mercenaries Reunion and even sprung the extra money for the new costumes. I love playing as Barry and Excella. Chris' new character is pretty awesome, too. The Hydra shotgun will stop anything dead in their tracks, while Barry's Samurai Edge combined with his "Headbutt" manuever make for an amazing way to get 30+ combos. Reunion is much easier than the original Mercs mini-game in RE5, but it's still fun. Everyone of the characters feels like you're playing as Hunk or Krauser in Mercs RE4. Nobody stands a chance against in you Mercs Reunion.

Lost in Nightmares:
Pros: It's Resident Evil, the atmosphere is reminiscent of the original 1997/2002 game.
Cons: Doesn't add anything to the story, short, uninspired enemies, unlockables don't carry over.
Overall: 5/10
Get if you like: Resident Evil to the point that you spent WAY too much money on it already.

Mercs Reunion:
Pros: It's easier than the original, fun as hell, new characters, you get to play as Barry
Cons: It's easier than the original, enemies seem dumber, you have to pay for new costumes (160ms points per two), two of the costumes are included in "Lost in Nightmares".
Overall: 7/10
Get if you like: Mercs in RE4 more than RE5

Resident Evil: Umbrella Chronicles (Wii)

In preparation for the release of Resident Evil 5: Lost in Nightmares coming up, I took the time to play through Umbrella Chronicles properly. I purchased this game the day it came out, forever ago, and only played it for a few minutes. I wasn't impressed with it initially and ultimately gave up on it.

I'm a Resident Evil fan, always have been, always will be. They've rarely done wrong with the main series and have generally shat on the chest of their fans with their spin-offs like this. So, I didn't give it any credence.

A couple years pass and I'm gung-ho about Resident Evil in preparation of the release of RE5's DLC. So I track down my UC disc, pop it in the Wii and play through the game in it's entirety. Didn't take long. One night and one afternoon's worth of gameplay.

It was decent, but it definitely wasn't good. Here's the skinny. It's a light gun game that's on rails with a few forks you get to choose. All you do is shoot. I have to admit that the mindless shooting makes it accessible to people who are not that adept at playing videogames. My girlfriend caught up on Resident Evil via this game. While she only watched RE4, 5 and the first half of REmake. This caught her up on 0, the second half of REmake and 3: Nemesis. The extra bits and second scenario are what really drove it home.

While the gameplay was weak and lame (to me, at least), the story pertaining to the extra levels was amazing. There's an Ada storyline that takes place after 2 but before the end of 3. There's a Hunk storyline that takes place right after the events of the first day of 3: Nemesis. As well as a story relating to how Rebecca Chambers got in the position she was in during the first game. Not to mention the extensive Wesker story-arc. That is the specific reason this game exists. That and the last scenario in the game. The final scenario details the hunt for Umbrella that Jill and Chris vow during the main series. This is something that we never get to experience; outside of Claire's foray onto Rockfort island during Code Veronica. This final scenario in the game really helps me understand what Chris and Jill were doing during the flashbacks of Resident Evil 5 and the upcoming DLC Lost in Nightmares.

The graphics and camera in the game are pretty crappy. It looks like a lightgun game from the Xbox/Gamecube days. I guess that makes sense. It's built on the RE4 game engine and runs on the Wii. It doesn't look as cool as the Wii edition of Resident Evil 4. But, the weapons are a mix of guns from all the previous Resident Evil tites (including the venerable Handcannon. Which became the first and only gun I upgraded. Until I had infinite ammo!) which made this little Resident Evil fan/gun nut bust a nut. The camera is pretty shaky. It's like the Blair Witch at times. The camera shakes and wobbles with your character's movement and makes it hard to hit certain items.

The game, in classic Resident Evil fashion, the game ranks and rates how you play. It's based on how many times you hit the enemy, how many items you destroy (which is fun, since there's so much stuff to destroy!), how many files you collect and how many "critical hits" you score. Don't get me started on that last one. The common zombies in this game are actually some of the hardest enemies to kill. They take multiple head shots from most guns and I can't even count how many shots from the Samurai Edge they take to the body before they go down. The Hunters, Lickers, Chimeras and messed up monkey things generally take a couple of shot gun rounds to put down... but the zombies... they take more than a few shotgun rounds. And that's on easy. On hard or medium... it's like they're wearing armor. In order to score a one hit kill on the zombies, you have to hit a dime sized portion of their foreheads in order to cause them to explode. Fuck you, Capcom.

This game really primes the pump for Resident Evil 5. It sheds light on exactly what Krauser, Wesker, Ada and Umbrella are up to in 4 and 5. I can easily recomend this to Resident Evil fans. But a Wii gamer who is not an Resident Evil fan should stay the fuck away.

Pros: Awesome story line and story filler, helps explain why RE5 is what it is, we love our Wesker.
Cons: Blair Witch style camera work, sub-par graphics, zombies eat bullets like fat kids eat jelly beans, light gun games are so 1993.
Play this if you like: Resident Evil games, House of the Dead, Area 51, Time Crisis, etc... etc...
Overall: 6/10

coming soon:

I will be reviewing the Resident Evil 5 DLC as it arrives. Much love to Capcom.

Mass Effect 2 (360)

Ok, motherfucker: this shit is sick.

I played the hell out of the first game, and in the past month or two, I have played the hell out of this one. I'm currently about 1/3 on the insane difficulty, and trust me: it's fucking insane.

I'm swearing so much because of how awesome this game is. I mean it, it's amazing.

I do have a few issues, however. The weapon and armor system is much more limited than in the first game. This game, you get maybe 2 or 3 different versions of each gun and 1 or 2 sets of armor. It lacks the variety of Mass Effect, but it makes up for it in sheer awesomeness of story.

There's one thing that the fellows at Bioware never let down on: story. Christ is the story in this one epic. I admit, it's not as lengthy as the original, but it really throws you for a few loops and makes you go "what the fuck?!" from time to time.

Trust me: it's very well worth it. I didn't run into any of the problems that other reviewers have with the game, so I have only the one complaint.

Overall, I give it a 9.73452791048 out of 10.

Zombies, Ghosts and Ghouls (or Why we Learned to Love the Devil)

In the later years of videogame development (IE: the fifth generation) we began to see the rise of the Survival Horror games, starting with Resident Evil in 1996 (I'm aware of Alone in the Dark (1992, PC) and Sweet Home (1989, NES), but they were forerunners to the genre). Resident Evil introduced the mainstream gaming crowd to slow paced scares requiring the player to analyse the situation and work out how to progress through the game. Being an older gamer, I've been around the industry for a LONG time and still remember the first time the dogs jumped through the windows.

But why did this push towards survival horror take place in the late 90's? Was it the changing land scape of the world? Societal upheaval? The possible end times that so many groups of people thought was coming in the year 2000? I posit this: the graphics. Simply put.

When you take a look at Resident Evil on the Playstation in 1996 and compare it to the Gamecube remake from 2002, you can see the leaps and bounds made in graphics between the 5th and 6th generation of game systems. Think about graphics going even further back, how could a game from 1992 possibly present the same ideas and fears that Resident Evil, Silent Hill, Fatal Frame and Parasite Eve?

The maturation of the industry, as well, is owed credit for the recent prevelence of horror games. With early games in the industry, the lack of photo like graphics didn't allow any violent or frightening images to be displayed with any power. There were games made based on horror movies for the Atari 2600, but it looked like stick men attacking stick men and trying to avoid traps. Later the industry was able to convey these horrible images and it was quickly recognized that gaming wasn't just for children and that there could be a sort of "Adult without Sex" end of the industry.

"Enter Survival Horror." So, does Resident Evil say anything more than "ZOMBIES!"? Of course it does, the arching plot of the series over the last 13 years has been based solely on the fact that a faceless, multinational corporation trying to make money at the expense of its customers. It definitely gave you something to think about in the late 1990's, but after 13 years of the same story being shoved down our throats, it's grown stale. Silent Hill is perhaps the crowning moment of videogame storyline achievement. Not just the first game, but the entire series. Silent Hill 2 being the perfect example.

Konami used Silent Hill 2 (2001) to mindfuck us. While playing through the game you're exposed to not only (arguably) the industry's scariest villain but also a ghost of James Sunderland's late wife, messages from the past and a creepy little girl that makes no sense in the story.

Resident Evil and Silent Hill offer much more than any other series of horror games have presented to the industry. Games like Kuon, Rule of Rose, Fatal Frame and Obscure. This isn't to say that the aforementioned games are not playable or even good games, but the fact is that they are formulaic and archaic compared to Capcom and Konami's offerings.

In recent years, though, Survival Horror has been put under the guillotine, causing us to play action games slated as Survival Horror. Resident Evil 4 started this revolution. I played the game as closely to the original Resident Evil as was possible and quickly found that by the end of the game I had hundreds of rounds of ammunition left over, where as I could never have enough in the original. Cold Fear quickly followed on the heals of Resident Evil 4 with a terrible game engine, terrible graphics and a plot that made me want to swallow a shotgun shell. Konami also tried to jump start this dying genre with their new take: Silent Hill 4: The Room. It went in the opposite direction of Resident Evil 4 by trapping the player in their character's apartment while playing mind games and denying the player weapons. And then the 7th Generation took place.

This is where I feel the genre ended. The Xbox 360 released with Resident Evil 5 on the horizon, Dead Rising slated for an early release date and Silent Hill 5 on the books. All of these games were made with more action in them than the earlier incarnations of the genre. Left 4 Dead introduced co-op first person players to the genre in a setting that they felt comfortable in and subsequently put the final nails in the coffin of the genre.

It's no secret that this genre is stale. 90% of Survival Horror games play exactly the same as one an other and the stories are getting rehashed and old. But, the elements that made Silent Hill, Resident Evil, Fatal Frame and Eternal Darkness so frightening and refreshing have been removed from the industry (including the aforementioned series') and have been replaced with "humorous" romps in malls, first person action shooters and rehashed "he's insane" story lines.

Star Wars: Old Republic (PC) commentary

So, I'm a huge fan of Knights of the Old Republic and am not ashamed of the fact that I bought an Xbox in 2004 just to play the sequel before it came out on the PC (although, looking back, the money I spent on the Xbox would have been better served buying a graphics card and waiting*) and have spent incalculable hours playing the series. The stories always offered something that was just amazing and made was able to suck me in for hours at a time.

I'm currently playing Elder Scrolls IV: Oblivion and enjoying some seasonal beer and realized what I truly enjoy in an RPG and why I'm frightened of the upcoming Bioware/Lucasarts MMORPG coming out in 2010: the story will be lacking. I spent a few months playing World of Warcraft and quickly fell behind my more serious friends and found that I didn't enjoy playing as a gimped character at level 12 while my level 30 friends did "awesome dungeons" and picked up awesome loot. I even spent a couple years playing the original Star Wars: Galaxies, as well as the "New Experience" and found that they lacked any kind of continuing story that I look for in games.

Which is why Star Wars: Old Republic scares the hell out of me, I'm afraid that turning the franchise into an MMORPG will sully the good name that Bioware worked out for this IP. I read the comics, I played the games and I waited years for the Team Gizka patch that never came, hoping for some extra bits and pieces of the story. I wanted to find out what happened to Revan and the Exile after the events of the games. I wanted to find out how the Exile came to have Reven's droids, I wanted to play more of the story...

But, by transforming it into an MMORPG, I can't see the story being exposed to the player. I have no doubt that this joint effort of two titans of the industry will produce a spectacular gaming experience, but I doubt that it will be able to flesh out the story in any shape that fans of the series are looking forward to.

I know that it'll be awesome to play as a Smuggler on Nal Hutta and pick up some awesome missions and such, but I fear that the ease with which a player can pick up a lightsaber will also create a void of homogeneity, leading to a server full of Jedi and Sith.

I really just want to play Knights of the Old Republic III, not an MMO where I'm forced to listen to idiots blather on in chatrooms and over microphones like I'm on Xbox Live. I just want to learn what happened to all my favorite characters.

I know that I'll sink the cash and time into the game, but I'm worried that I'm not going to get what I want out of the game...

(* I was running a Pentium 4 3.2ghz CPU with 512 DDR Ram at 577 and a Geforce FX5200GT at the time, premium and top notch, aside from the 5200. Only thing I ever upgraded in that system was the ram, up to 1.5gb. Now, it's an Intel Q6600 clocked at 3.1GHZ with 3 Gigs of DDR2 at 800MHZ and a Geforce 8800GT, not the cream of the crop, but, decent.)

Silent Hill: Shattered Memories (Wii)

I'm not going to hide my love of Survival Horror games , especially the Resident Evil franchise, so it's no surprise that I've sunk countless hours into the game. It even started a cascade of playing through the entire series of Silent Hill games, one after the other.

Shattered Memories breaks free of certain conventions that have been part of the Survival Horror since the inception of Infogrames' Alone in the Dark in 1992. You don't have to worry about ammo conservation or juggling health items in your limited inventory, you in fact don't even have an inventory or any weapons! It's a strange experience to play a game like this without weapons, and creates a very intense feeling of dread when you feel danger is imminent. It seems that, given Resident Evil 4, Silent Hill: Homecoming, Alone in the Dark (2008), Dead Rising and Left 4 Dead, that Survival Horror is in the throes of being reimagined and changed (sometimes for the better, sometimes for the worse). Shattered Memories plays out more like an old point-n-click adventure game in 3D than a conventional Survival Horror game.

Shattered Memories is a standard retelling of Silent Hill to start with, but quickly varies from the source material, just as Christopher Gans' terrible film adaptation did. The variations in this game were welcome, when compared to the film, as a complete remake, rather than reimagination, would be boring to most fans of the series. Even Silent Hill: 0 (Origins in N/A) lacked much new material and felt somewhat forced into the series, Shattered Memories does not fall into that trap. It starts with Harry Mason trying to find his daughter, Cheryl, after a car crash, as the rest of the game plays out, you scratch your head trying to figure it out. All of the characters from the original Playstation's Silent Hill are featured in the game, but in very different ways than you're used to in the series. Lisa Garland, Cybil Bennett, Dahlia and Dr. Kaufmann are all in the game, but if you're hoping for them to be the same people from 1999, you're in for a disappointment.

Shattered Memories plays fairly quickly, and fluidly. There are very few points in the game where you find yourself stuck and unable to figure out the puzzles (all of which are fairly simple), the hardest puzzles take place in the middle of the dreaded "chase sequences," sometimes requiring you to backtrack through danger and take photos while small, ugly monsters attempt to kill you. Just a tip: remember what color the toucan's beak is. The chase sequences are something that I feel get repetitive and confusing. On initial playthroughs of the game, it's easy for the player to get lost running through new environments and get overwhelmed by the following monsters. It's true that doors are highlighted, helping you get away, but I found myself going in circles quite frequently. On subsequent playthroughs, I would plan my path out before known chase sequences and beeline to the end of the chase sequences.

As you progress through the game, your mind is constantly raped by the other characters and events in the game, especially if you're used to the franchise. None of the characters in the game are what they seem. An interesting route that Climax took with this installation of the series, was a constantly changing game. Being a Survival Horror addict, I'm well aware and used to the idea of different endings in games, but in each subsequent play through with Shattered Memories I found not only subtle differences, but felt the game had a completely different demeanor. Sometimes the women would be hussies, sometimes respectable. Sometimes the monsters featured awkwardly sexual anatomy, sometimes just faceless goons. The ending is always the same, it's the back story that changes, in an interesting twist. The outcome and condition of the game is decided through a series of psychological examinations given to you by another character, what object you spend more time looking at, as well as what you take pictures of, it's very fluid and dynamic and it isn't as simple as you'd think to get the outcomes you want.

This game does feature the most elaborate means of achieving the UFO ending in all the series. It requires you to capture 18 UFOs with your camera and call a phone number on Harry's phone. Speaking of Harry's phone, Climax took some hints from other current popular games (IE: GTAIV) and incorporated the Cell Phone as a tool and stole the "Camera capturing ghosts" idea from Fatal Frame. It isn't anything new for ideas from one series to translate into the other (especially in the Survival Horror genre), but it's rare for it to be as fluidly incorporated as Climax did. There are bonus finds throughout the game that help elaborate on the story of the game if you find all the little bits and pieces. Through your phone, you can call for help, take pictures of ghosts and receive voice and text messages from the dead. It's a very interesting mechanic to add to the game.

Overall, I was fairly pleased with the game. It wasn't as predictable as I thought it would be, but I attribute that to my anticipations as a fan, the gameplay was fresh and I thoroughly enjoyed the entire experience. For many, the game may be worth merely a rental, as a single play through can be had in one or two nights, but for fans of the genre, a purchase is necessary to achieve all endings and extras.

Pros: It's Silent Hill, refreshing game play, unique character development, great visuals, chilling sound, perfect controls.
Cons: Ending isn't as epic as past Silent Hill outings, lacks any type of combat, sometimes feel repetitive, certain characters in the game seem forced.
Play if you like: Survival Horror in general.
Overall: 8/10

Broken Sword: Shadow of the Templars Directors Cut (DS)

This game was released almost 3 quarters of a year ago in March of '09. It, unfortunately, slipped under my nose for so long, but yesterday I acquired a copy of the game and spent the entire day playing the game.

I was raised playing Lucasarts and Sierra point-n-click games on PC, going all the way back to Headline Harry, Gold Rush and Colonel's Bequest on a 286 (not to mention, I never really got anywhere in Gold Rush, that game's crazy hard). I'm not going to hide my bias towards point-n-click gameplay and adventure games, as that's the entire reason I spent an entire day playing Broken Sword on the DS.

This is a port, as well as minor reimagining, of the original game from the Broken Sword series. The main game varies ever so slightly from the original release on PC (in 1996), the only parts of the game that were definitely new were the parts where you play as the supporting character Nicole Collard, as well as a gallery of concept art. That's not a whole lot of extra game (considering I own an original copy from 1996) to make up for buying a new copy of the game, but it does add just a little bit to the story.

The game, itself, has a classic adventure narrative, coupled with an unusual diaspora theme as well as religious ideology being a large piece of the narrative without being overbearing. You play as George Stobartt, an American on vacation in Paris, who gets unwittingly involved in a conspiracy that leads to his travelling across all of Europe. The story seems rather forced, initially, but once you get past George's initial involvement, you start to settle into the story and appreciate the grandeur of the game. To give you an idea of how forced it is without giving away any major plot events, George says "I believe in justice, and I must go after the man who did this" and does a better job at investigating than the police.

The graphics are about what you'd expect, quality wise, from a port of a PC from 1996, but I was slightly bothered by the cartoonish style that the characters were drawn in. It wasn't an issue with the graphics themselves, but rather a differing of opinion that the artists at Revolution Software and myself have. The puzzles in the game tend to be simpler than most other games from the same period (think of Kings Quest 6 from Sierra and The Dig from Lucasarts as contemporaries), but still offered a bit of a challenge from time to time.

Broken Sword also offers an in game hint system that made consulting the internet for frustrating parts almost completely obsolete. It made it easier to stay submerged in the game's universe and appreciate that the developer was more interested in making the game accessible and enjoyable than create moments of absolute frustration and hatred.

I finished the game in a single sitting, albeit a 12 hour single sitting with breaks for lunch and dinner. I can't say that the game is absolutely worth the price of admission, given the lack of a talkie track (especially, considering that with SCUMMVM DS and a copy of The Dig, you can get that with a talkie track on your DS) and any other extras that I'd hope to get in a "Directors Cut," but it was a fun trip down memory lane for this old Adventure gamer. There was also the issue of the soundtrack being Midi tracks, rather than WAV or MP3 audio, making for a quick disconnect, sound wise, from the game. I admit, that once I found out there was no talking track and the audio was weak, I spent the day watching movies while playing the game.

Pros: Beautiful graphics for a 13 year old port, hint system allows easy play, grand story line that spans Europe, decent character developement, strangely relevant in 2010 for a game made in 1996, beautiful cut scenes.
Cons: No talking track, Midi audio blows, ending comes far to quickly and with too little effort.
Play if you liked: any of the adventure games from the 80's and 90's.
Overall: 7/10

Also, visit the developers website for info on the game, as well as freeware versions of Beneath of Steel Sky and Lure of the Temptress, which are both very similar games:
http://www.revolution.co.uk/